So does any of this sound familiar?
- Are your evenings and weekends spent complaining about your work and how life isn’t turning out how you hoped?
- Do you feel like you have no spare time for relaxing or having fun, but just rush around completing an endless ‘to do’ list?
- When you do have free time, do you just crash out in front of the TV or scroll mindlessly through social media?
- Are you staying in a job that makes you unhappy and doesn’t pay enough, but feel powerless to change your situation?
Well I WAS that person. I got so used to feeling stressed out, complaining about my life and making excuses about why I was stuck in a rut, that it became a deeply ingrained habit that I wasn’t even aware of.
I had become so negative that it was even starting to affect my health, happiness and relationships.
Usually sympathetic friends would glaze over or change the subject when I started to complain about work.
I became snappy and resentful, and took my unhappiness out on the closest people to me (my endlessly understanding boyfriend deserves a medal!).
I had less energy, didn’t feel like going out, and started to wonder where the ‘old me’ had gone…
When you are in that mindset, it can be hard to contemplate how you’re ever going to start changing your life around. It all feels too exhausting and scary, and so you stay stuck.
Creating your dream career or business takes time, and there are no quick fixes. If you’re well and truly stuck in a rut, then you will have been thinking the same old negative thoughts over and over for a long time, which will be bringing your energy down.
However what started to change things for me was when I came across a positive psychology tool called a gratitude journal.
Once I started looking into it, I realised that I was pretty late to the party! Arianna Huffington features them in her book Thrive, Kate Hudson writes in hers every day, and Oprah has been keeping hers for years.
It requires you to notice what’s good in your life each day, rather than what is wrong, and studies have shown that it increases life satisfaction, happiness, optimism and energy, and staves off depression, anxiety, envy and loneliness.
So ask yourself these 3 questions each day, and briefly note down the answers in your journal:
- What is good in your life?
- What are you grateful for?
- What has gone well?
After just a week, I was able to look back and start to appreciate what I already had in my life:
I felt less like a failure and started to notice my successes.
My confidence and self belief started to grow
I started to feel more creative and think more clearly and positively
Change brings energy, and new ways of thinking. This is the first step to breaking those old habits that have been holding you back for waaaaay too long.
- So if you’re feeling hopeless…
- So if you’re feeling stuck…
- So if you’re feeling overwhelmed…
Give the journalling a try for just 7 days, and let me know how you get on. I’d love to hear if this little tip has helped you get unstuck too.